Men like a woman to play with their penis. To them it
is their most important appendage and needs lots of
attention by their lover. If you’ve never just taken
the time to look at the male member, I suggest asking
your man to get naked and lay on the bed while you
inspect it. Feel free to ask him questions about it.
I’ve never met a man who doesn’t like to show himself
off, and when you do it for the first time, this type
of foreplay can lead to very satisfying sex for both of
It is my opinion that most women don’t have a clue what
makes a man tick sexually. I’ve learned over the years
that we women take it for granted that whenever we lie
on our backs and offer ourselves to our men that they
will do what comes naturally. This is true, but even
the hottest sex life can become humdrum with
I believe the reason for so many divorces these days is
simply that couples are lazy about their sex lives.
Good oral sex can keep a man satisfied and faithful to
you even when the wrinkles start to come and
intercourse isn’t what it used to be.
Oral sex should be even better than intercourse; it
should be so intense that your man ends up whimpering
for mercy, and he ends up curling up into the fetal
position. I know that I can do that to a man, and if I
can so can you.
There are four important rules that any woman who wants
to really please her man in bed should adhere to.
Rule 1. Worship his penis.
Get to know his penis. As I mentioned before, every man
likes to have his penis played with. If you haven’t
been interested in playing with his penis in the past,
get that way now. When you’re both naked try spending
time playing with it. Just tell him that you want to
play with it for a while, he won’t stop you.
Make him hard by slowly jacking him with your hand.
Never squeeze too hard, but always hold him firmly and
move the skin of his penis against the substructure of
his shaft. There’s a good reason why men like to
masturbate, it’s because it feels good. You can make
him feel good too. Ask him what he likes.
A woman who can jack her man off to orgasm will be his
best lover ever. Play with it, feel it, kiss it, jack
it, talk to it. Press it to your breasts; rub it
against your face and lips. Tell him how beautiful it
is, even suck on it. It’s easy to be considered a
fantastic lover when you worship your man’s penis.
You’ll also have great sex afterwards.
When you worship him, you have to really mean it.
Faking will be obvious. If you don’t like your man
enough to worship his penis, then you’re with the wrong
Rule 2. Don’t automatically expect anything in return.
Many lovers are just plain selfish. Both men and woman.
The old clich� is “Slam Bam, Thank You Maam.” Implying
that the man is the selfish one. It has been my
experience that there is enough selfishness in sexual
relationships to go around.
I firmly believe that selfishness has nothing to do
with gender. A selfish lover is someone who was brought
up poorly by his or her parents and they are usually
self-centered selfish people in most things they do.
Selfish lovers usually are miserly friends, or shallow
thinkers; it’s a society-thing not a gender-thing.
If you approach your lover with the thought of, “I only
want to please you,” and mean it, you’ll be surprised
how much he will respond in kind. The best sex I’ve
ever had was when both of us were intent on pleasing
Rule 3. Don’t Be Overly Squeamish.
Don’t expect anyone to be sexually attracted to you if
you stink. I am not talking about fresh natural
lubricants when I mention stink. If you want to be a
good oral lover you have to accept the natural
excretions that a man exudes.
I’ve performed oral sex on a man right after he’s
emptied himself in my pussy, and no I didn’t have a
moist towel to clean him up first. There is nothing
more erotic to a man than to see his lover take his
used penis into her mouth and give him another erection
when only moments before he thought it was all over.
(After all, no matter how messy his penis has become,
it’s only the natural excretions from sex, yours and
his. Feel free to wipe the froth off with your hand,
but don’t get too fastidious or you’ll blow the mood.)
If you can’t take natural body tastes and odors then
give up being a good cocksucker right now. Everything a
man excretes is harmless, and besides if you love him
you’ll learn to love his natural odors and lubricants.
My suggestion is to try it in little increments. As an
example, when you’re “inspecting” your man’s equipment,
squeeze out some of that nice clear pre-cum of his, so
a big drop stands out from his pee-hole. Lap it off
with your tongue. If you make a show of it for him,
he’ll love you for it, and you’ll see that it doesn’t
taste bad all at the same time.
Rule 4. Don’t Stop!
This might be the most important rule of them all. If
your man is ready to cum, don’t stop what you’re doing.
It should be obvious to the demist bulb out there when
her man is about to reach his peak.
Experimenting and variety is great, but as the moment
of orgasm approaches, keep the pressure up, keep the
rhythm going. If he wants you to do something else,
he’ll tell you, but if it looks like he’s ready, don’t
Okay, enough for rules. The rest of my remarks will be
confined to technique, mixed with some philosophy about
men and what they like.
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist for give good head.
But over time you’ll learn a few things that make it
better and better. In time, when you tell him he’ll be
getting some head; he will be on his best behavior
because he will be eager for the promised pleasure.
After getting to know and love your man’s penis, which
is a must. The next step is to try it out. It is good
to know and REMEMBER these simple things:
ABOUT YOUR TEETH:
Always remember your teeth. Even the smallest scrape by
a sharp bicuspids can end the whole thing. On the other
hand, moist lips are the perfect friction that will
drive him wild.
If you want to try the technique out in private and
don’t have a vegetable oil lubricated dildo, I suggest
a large pickle. The advantage to this vegetable is that
it most mimics the feel of a penis and is usually
smaller than the real thing.
Just barely cover your teeth with your lips, forming
your mouth into an “O” and try slipping the pickle in.
(Hold the pickle stationary and “bob” your head.) See
if you can feel your teeth touching the skin of the
pickle, if you do, keep practicing until you’re sure
you have it down. Keep in mind that a male penis is
more comfortable and much more pleasurable to suck on
than a pickle.
NOTE: Speaking of sucking. That is a misnomer. A good
blowjob is all about friction, not sucking. What you
are trying to accomplish is to recreate the vagina with
your mouth. Sucking is just a term, such as “sleeping
with” refers to making love, while “sucking cock” just
means oral sex with a male. I’m not saying that you
can’t suck on your man’s erect penis, which of course
you should, all I’m saying is that if you want to get
him off, it’ll take a lot more than just suction to do
THE GAG REFLEX:
Almost anyone can learn to control their gag reflex,
with the exception of those few people who have an over
active gag reflex, which is probable less than 1/100th
of a percent of the population. If you can swallow a
pill using water, you can control your gag reflex.
First, you must discern where your throat is, in
relation to your windpipe, they are two different
things. Most things can go down your throat just fine,
but only air will go into your windpipe without causing
Unlike those porno stories where the woman learns how
to control her gagging while a man is plowing away at
her throat, the best way to learn is not with your
I learned the technique at the early age of 18 by using
my finger. I had a boyfriend that I wanted to please so
it was important to me to learn how to do fellatio
I would stick my finger in my mouth and tickle the back
of my throat. If your finger isn’t long enough I
suggest using a dildo, or a wet piece of liquorish.
(Just make sure that whatever you use, it is long
enough to maintain a good grasp on with your fingers so
it won’t become lodges in your windpipe if
A secret that no one told me about is that if you learn
how to swallow when he thrusts in, your gag reflex is
greatly suppressed. I had to learn that for deep
penetration before it finally became comfortable for
me. A plus about that technique is that it feels real
good to your man while it helps you perform better, a
win, win situation.
You don’t have to get the gag reflex completely
conquered before trying out a real live penis. Just
remember that if you throw up on your man it will take
a little something away from your sex act.
I’ve never met a man who expected me to take them all
the way in. Most men, even experienced ones have only
received a little sucky-kissy, and that’s all they
expect. But let me tell you, when I get to work on them
they never forget the experience, I’ve actually made
some men cry.
When you find that with practice, you can control your
gag reflex well enough to take your man at least to the
back of your mouth, you will truly be on the way to
giving a superior blowjob.
At this stage there is something to remember for your
own safety before trying the real thing. Always allow
yourself a way to disengage. You cannot breathe with a
big stiff cock jammed down your throat. It hasn’t
happened often, but there has been a party girl or two
who have suffocated because of an over excited face
fucking jerk who wouldn’t stop when she started
flailing her arms and legs in protest.
Just be sure that you are in control and can back off
at will and everything will be fine. This is even more
important when you’re new to it. Your understanding man
will help you here. He’ll be so fascinated by the fact
that you want to experiment with oral sex and are
trying to do it right that he’ll want to cooperate in
any way he can.
THE DEEP THROAT:
I first learned the deep-throat technique with a
favorite boyfriend. I read up on all the different ways
to do it and decided to try it like this:
I lay on my bed and my boyfriend got several phone
books and a towel to cushion his knees and elevated
himself to the right height so that his erect penis was
aligned with my mouth. Lying stomach down and bending
my head back to face his crotch I let him slowly feed
himself to me.
The advantage to this position for the beginner is that
it lines up the man’s erect penis with your throat. The
head being pulled back almost straightens the throat
into an open tunnel without having to bend the penis
too much to fit.
The position can also be reversed so that the woman is
laying on her back with her head hanging over the edge
of the bed. What I don’t like about this for the
beginner is that if your partner is inexperienced (or a
jerk) he might not stop when you signal him to. If he
grabbed a couple of handfuls of hair he could ride your
face with the potential of really making things
uncomfortable for you.
Breathing while your man makes love to your mouth can
be a challenge. It takes practice, but can be easily
accomplished with concentration. Breathe when he has
pulled back, and swallow when his thrusts in. It’s easy
to panic and lose it if you don’t concentrate, but be
assured that in time it will become almost second
nature to you.
Just so you know, the ultimate goal for a good oral sex
practitioner is to be able to allow your partner to use
your mouth and throat just like he would your pussy,
with just a little more consideration for the fact that
you have to breathe through the same hole that he’s
making love to. Once you know what you’re doing you’ll
be able to take him into your throat even in the
“submissive” kneeling position.
Oral sex is more than just the insertion of the penis
into the mouth; it’s all about friction. Soft most
friction, fast and slow friction, textured friction,
tactile and visual stimulation too. In the next few
paragraphs I will tell you about the secret weapon that
you have at your disposal to make your man cum in your
mouth every time you want him to.
I told you earlier to be careful with your teeth. Now
I’m going to tell you that teeth can be pleasurable to
your man during oral sex. The FRONT of your teeth, not
the biting edge.
The contrast of the hard smooth porcelain of the front
of your teeth, with the soft smooth giving texture of
your lips and the hot moist slipperiness of your tongue
combine to make oral sex something that can be mind
blowing if used in the proper sequence.
The secret to get a man to shoot off is “variety”. If
you just kneel and bob, he’ll most likely let you, but
I doubt if he will have an orgasm. (Barring first times
You should start off your oral sex using your tongue.
Lick him — swirl your tongue around and around the
head, suck on the head with your moist lips, rub the
underside of the head and shaft against the flat of
your teeth, then sink down on him as far as your can.
The tongue is the secret weapon to any great oral sex.
Most women can’t swirl their tongue around their man’s
shaft while it is in their mouth. If you have a big
mouth like mine it can be done. But if you don’t, don’t
despair. You can get around this by licking him like a
lollypop, and swirling it around his sensitive head.
And the man gets the added “visual” stimulation so
Licking is something you should do whether or not you
can swirl your tongue around his shaft with it embedded
in your mouth. Licking and head kissing-sucking is
important. It plays to the “cock-worship” stimulation;
it has both the physical and visual aspects that make
the difference between a humdrum blowjob and a great
Masturbation is also an important part of oral sex, it
heightens the friction and brings your man closer to
orgasm faster. (You’d be surprised how many woman have
never actually been able to get their men off with
masturbation. That is usually because she doesn’t know
how and has never REALLY tried to do it right.)
The proper masturbation technique is important. Many
women hold the penis too lightly or too tight. Feel the
skin, it should move against the substructure of his
shaft smoothly, almost like pudding. An uneven rhythm
is best, don’t try to compete with his own technique
because you’ll lose. He has the advantage of knowing
how he feels and what turns him on. But you have a big
advantage too, you turn him on just by being naked and
worshiping his penis. Even he can’t do that as well as
In my opinion swallowing is important. A man’s sperm is
98% protein, and it’s tasteless. It smells like bleach,
and is slippery like clams, but it’s pretty nice once
you get used to it. You can make quite a scene
swallowing it. My suggestion is to let him see that you
are swallowing his cum. If you don’t mind looking
slutty, (And I don’t) let some of his precious cum
slide out between your lips and then suck it back in
and swallow it. A brilliant smile at this moment will
I read a book once that said if you didn’t want to
swallow, you could always spit it out on a towel. My
feeling is that if you’ve been “sucking” your man’s
dick long enough to make him cum, why stop there? A
man’s cum is actually good for you, (High in Protein)
and it can’t hurt you and it is the final affirmation
that you think he’s hot.
With a new lover I suggest finding out were he stands
sexually. If you’ve just given him the blowjob of his
life and he’s accepted your gift, see how he reacts
next. Is he a giver or not?
When I get to know a man I finish off with a french-
kiss to send all french-kisses. (Not suggested for a
first time sexual union, unless he seems eager for it.)
You might be surprised; about 25% of the men I’ve been
with didn’t mind tasting their own cum, and some of
them enjoyed it immensely, starting our hot encounter
over again. (And I enjoyed the cum swapping too.)
There are more techniques that make a girl a real pro
at oral sex, but I think I’ll let you find these out
for yourself. I’ve armed you with all the knowledge
that you’ll need to be the best little cock sucker
he’ll probably ever know. The key is your imagination,
if you’ve got it, you’ll succeed swimmingly, if you
don’t, well, I’m sorry, just do the best you can.
I will tell one more secret though, and it is the most
important thing to know of all.
Although good oral sex is about friction, variety and
good mouth work, it amounts to only half of what’s
needed to make a man blow his load. The other half (and
believe me when I say this) is visual stimulation.
Act sexy, but not gross; my rule of thumb is, “Just
because you can, doesn’t mean you should.” Never a
truer statement was made. Make sure you know your
partner before becoming too experimental. But once you
do know him, pull out all the stops to please him.
Let him “see” you sucking on him, let him “see” you
worshiping his penis; let him “see” you enjoying his
equipment. Make sure that he knows with certainty that
you love him and his equipment. Submit to his wonderful
instrument, caress it, make love to it, you will be
rewarded a million times over by a most grateful lover.
I can’t emphasize this enough, visual stimulation is as
important at the sex act itself. You’ll know when
you’ve got it right — when you feel a throb and then a
hot gush of jism between your lips. You’ll know that
you’ve got it right when you and your man are still
together after all of your friends have broken up and
One final note: All of the above presupposes that
you’re with a worthy man, a man that is worthy of your
talents. If he’s not, no matter how great you are in
bed, you’re headed nowhere. You’d be better off with
the single girl next door than the handsomest man in
the world if he’s a jerk. But then, you have to
determine that, all I can tell you for sure is that
there are some “real men” out there, ones that you
could grow old with if you don’t neglect them.
SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS:
If you have any secrets that you use to give your man a
special buzz, email the author at
firstname.lastname@example.org. If it is pertinent it will be
pasted below so other oral sex advocates can use your
thoughts to heighten their partner’s pleasure. Fellatio
or related only please…
Reader Comments: (Comments moderated.)
Here are some additional topics suggestions by readers.
If you have any that I’ve missed that are of interest
to you, be sure to let me know. If I am able, I will
answer your questions.
THE UNCIRCUMCISED PENIS:
I didn’t mention the un-cut penis previously because I
don’t really care which a man has, they’re both
beautiful in their own way. But there are some
different techniques that could be employed to enhance
your uncircumcised companion.
The majority of men in the US are circumcised. This is
due to the fact that most hospital birthing units
recommend the practice. But lately some parents are
starting to rethink the decision to have their male
The advantages of non-circumcision are that the man’s
organ will be more sensitive, more responsive to touch
and he will receive a higher level of pleasure. The
folds of skin that cover the relaxed penis head, shield
it against much daily stimulation so when it peeks its
head out from between the folds of flesh protecting it,
it is super pre-conditioned for the pleasure
Generally uncircumcised men will not last as long as
circumcised men will during the first sexual encounter
of the night. But my experience has been that they will
ultimately have just as much stamina over the long run,
and there’s more to play with.
There are several things that you need to know about
uncircumcised men that are pretty irrelevant with
circumcised men. One is that masturbating an
uncircumcised man is easier. You don’t have to worry
about skin burn because the foreskin is a great
protector of the extended portion of the penis shaft.
I especially enjoy playing with the foreskin, and men
with one like it when you lick it and pull gently at it
with your lips or teeth. The foreskin is very
sensitive, it’s almost like an extension of the penis
head, yes it can be that sensitive to a man.
Mother Nature knew what she was doing when she created
the male sex organ, but uncircumcised men should
always be meticulous about cleanliness. Where a
circumcised man can get away with being a little ripe,
and uncircumcised man can’t. There’s nothing sexier
than a clean uncircumcised penis, and nothing that is
more of a turn off than a grubby one. Where the
foreskin protects, it also collects old excretions.
Someone once asked me which type of penis I liked the
best and my answer was, “One that can stay hard long
enough to give me an orgasm!”
LOCKJAW OR JAW FATIGUE:
One reader asked me to talk about jaw fatigue during
oral sex. Apparently his partner often experienced the
problem and he wanted to know if there was an exercise
to combat the problem.
I personally have never experienced any significant jaw
fatigue giving oral sex. But I know after talking to
friends and comparing notes that about half of the
women I talked to have fatigue if they perform Fellatio
for more that 5-minutes continuously.
After some research I’ve found that there are two
conditions to be aware of.
The first one is just plain fatigue. This is something
that you can easily correct. If you’ve tired your jaw
out from having to open-wide, then you’ve been doing
the same thing too long. Size might have something to
do with it, but even if your man has a jumbo penis
there are many different things you do than just suck,
you can rotate through your bag of tricks and give your
jaw a rest.
As I outlined earlier, if you plan on just sucking your
man’s penis, he won’t stop you, but it usually isn’t
enough stimulation to get him off. You need to combine
you mouthwork with handwork, and girls don’t forget
those tits. Mother Nature gave us some great tools, and
I don’t know a man who would object while you took a
break from sucking and rubbed his manly shaft against
your nipples, or did some kissing while slowly jacking
As I’ve tried to make plain, there is much more to a
great blowjob than just the mouth. So if you are so
fatigued that you can’t bring things to completion,
then I suggest that you reread my little guide and try
The second problem is TMJ (Temporo-Mandibular Joint),
which is the other prevalent problem at least in
America. It is a syndrome that is becoming epidemic in
our society. It is basically a miss alignment of the
jaw and can cause great discomfort not even talking
about oral sex. Apparently it causes headaches and
If you suffer from this problem you’ll need to see your
dentist because I have no fix for it. But again, I can
suggest that offering variety, fingers, tongue, lips,
breasts, eyelids , toes and any other part of your body
as a stimulant will even out the strain on your jaw and
your man will gain more pleasure than just a plainjane
blowjob that leads nowhere.